The cost of admission to the fairgrounds of your dreams

Embarrassment is the price of entry.

If you look at anyone who's achieved even a modicum of success, you'll notice something pretty consistent.

They all did what they were scared to do. All the while still scared.

Most people think fear looks like running from a bear. Deep in the woods, heart pumping. Operating on pure instinct.

That fear of death or the unknown.

But fear in modern life is quieter. It is that fear of looking stupid, rejection, or the eyes on you. Everyone watching.

Those thoughts are natural. We are wired to fit in with the herd. Fall in line.

Belonging used to be survival.

The problem is that the herd doesn't lead anywhere new.

And everything you say you want sits on the other side of that fear: the raise the job the relationship the opportunity the version of you that feels ungoverned

Fear does not just abracadabra away when you get brave.

You just learn that it is a fixed cost.

I struggle with this constantly.

The restless nights. Laying awake staring at the ceiling, running the same questions in circles.

What if I fail? What if I doesn't work out and I look like a fool? What if I'm not ready?

Even something small, like asking for a raise can feel like a cold approach.

You don't know if it'll land. You don't know if you'll walk away with what you wanted... Or walk away embarrassed.

Same thing with asking someone about a job. Same thing with putting your work out in public. Same thing with writing, posting, creating, shipping anything that feels like it came from you.

And the crazy part is: the fear isn't always lying.

That tightness you feel in your gut exists for a reason.

It's ancient wiring.

A survival system built for the savannah. Back then, fear meant: be careful or you die.

Now fear means: be careful or you might look like a fool. And we treat them the same.

We treat embarrassment like it's a real threat.

But in modern life, you aren't punished for taking risks. You're punished for avoiding them. Because nothing happens when you play it safe.

Nothing changes. Nothing opens.

You dont' get rewarded for complacency, you get rewarded for motion.

That means taking actionable steps toward your goal.

There seems to be this vibe that is echoed throughout social media about "Be nicer to yourself."

And I get it. I am not above it. Sometimes rest isn't weakness, it is fuel.

I also think a lot of us hide behind that phrase.

We confuse comfort with healing, avoidance with self-care, and we label it as protecting our peace.

It is because your ego doesn't want you to look dumb.

It wants you to look like you had if figured out the whole time.

But that's not how growth and confidence works. Confidence is built by collecting proof that you can survive being seen mid-process. That you can fall on your face an still wake up the next day.

You can be the person that tried.

I've been posting every week since August of 2024. And lately I've been wondering if it's time to stop and reflect.

Not because I am quitting, but because I realizing that I never want to feel the fear.

The goal is to stop letting fear decide.

Embarrassment is the price of entry.

And if you are not willing to pay it, you'll spend your whole life standing outside the door... Watching other people live the life you want.